La Graîne Brûlée - The Sound of Ste-Catherine
Even if the Graine Brûlée isn't nearly as relax as the painting job suggests, it's still a damn interesting and practical place to go to.
Our caffeinated journey starts here. I won't get too much into why I decided to test every cafés in Montreal (you can go on my about page for a longer statement), but here's the Threads post that sparked it all :
Post by @roxanefuturView on Threads
Without further ado, let's hop off at our first stop: La Graine Brûlée. It may be my first choice for a review, but don't get me wrong, it's not my favorite spot. I'll keep that surprise for another post.
BTW, the name means "The Scorched Bean" or something similar in English. However, the play on words is kinda lost in translation. In French, "Graine" means "Bean," but it's also slang for cock. It borders on a crude joke but will surely get a cute laugh out of the friends you'll bring over.
Punk is Not Dead... or is it?
If you looked at the pictures so far, you've probably noticed the bright and pastel colors, the graffiti, the small tables but in a playful circle, around a bench that's itself a circle.
It's not just a whimsical kid core art installation...
If so, you probably think that this third wave café within the border of the gay village and two steps away from the UQAM university is pretty, shall we say, punk.
I'd say it's the impression they go for. But it's not what stuck with me. It felt like it was an expertly crafted and managed experience. From your first to the last step of your trip, every square meter is tailored for a particular experience or purpose.
The big circle-shaped bench I mentioned earlier? There's a sign about how you can rent it for a group. Waiting in a big line to order? You'll have an expansive gift and candy boutique on your left to let your eyes wander.
And the bathroom with children's program music and stroboscopic lights? It's not just a whimsical kid-core art installation; it's also a clever way to dissuade homeless people from across the street from coming here to satisfy their biological or consumption needs.
It's... not peak punk.
Enough Chitchat, What About the Coffee??
Even if the Graine Brûlée isn't nearly as relax as the painting job suggests, it's still a damn interesting and practical place to go to. It's 1 minute away from the crossroad of 3 metro lines (3 being a lot, for Montreal), the menu has a lot of vegan option (ideal for my dairy allergy), and it's easy to get comfortable in the multiple furniture option. There's even a little cavern where you can play Super Nintendo! (what do you say, it's for the children??).
Since we're already pretty comfortable with each others (after all, I confessed about my dairy allergy), I have another secret to share. I didn't even order coffee at the Graine Brûlée 😲.
I went there a few time, and the coffee didn't leave me a big impression. Plus, they serve it in a thrift shop worthy kind of cut that doesn't seem to contain as much as a regular commercial cup.
I went ahead with the lavender lemonade and vegan brownies. Desserts are rare to come around when you have a dairy allergy, so I couldn't pass on the occasion.
The lemonade was as I expected from the bright color, punched with a chemical like taste. Little shards of sugar (or lavender powder?) was rolling on my tongue at every sip. I don't complain, I love the childlike summer taste of chemical lemonade or popsicles.
After getting my order (and snapping a pic of the super nes), I went outside to enjoy my order on their 6 table capacity terrace.
Ste-Catherine street, it's not business as usual
Out of the organized chaos of La Graine Brûlée, I was able to grasp the mood of Ste-Catherine street that day. Many rainbow flags and sculptures (it's within the "gay" Village, after all). But the 6 colors can't overpower the grayness that sticks on the streets and buildings. Within the 15 minutes I've been there, I saw 6 policemen and 2 people being arrested.
While I was sipping gentrified lemonade, a bearded man was shouting parts of words to his friend on the sidewalk next to me. I was about to finish my brownie when I heard a sharp woman's scream and a police car accelerating. Neither the bystanders nor I could make up what had unwound. We suspect the woman in question couldn't either; she resumed her jumping in place instead of answering the policeman's questions.
A friend of mine once said the homeless people are really different ever since the opioid crisis. "They don't even look like getting high makes them feel good anymore. They just jump, and jump, and jump."
The whole experience left the usual unsettling taste in my mouth, or maybe it was the sound of Ste-Catherine, still ringing in my ears.
Excerpt from the La Graîne Brûlée menu
Petits repas (Small Meals)
Croissant et confiture (Croissant and jam)
Croissant et beurre de noisette (Croissant and hazelnut butter)
Muffin
Sandwich matin (Morning sandwich)
Bagel et fromage à la crème (Bagel and cream cheese)
Bagel saumon fumé (Bagel and smoked salmon)
Limonades (Lemonades)
Limonade classique (Classic lemonade)
Limonade framboise (Raspberry lemonade)
Limonade bleuet (Blueberry lemonade)
Limonade lavande (Lavender lemonade)
Limonade melon d'eau (Watermelon lemonade)
Cocktails
Spritz
Mojito
Bloody Mary
Margarita
Piña Colada
Boissons chaudes (Hot Drinks)
Espresso
Cappuccino
Latte
Thé (Tea)
Chocolat chaud (Hot chocolate)
Special thanks to my thriend @quillmatiq for helping me set up this self-hosted ghost website. Please take a look at his blog on my reading suggestions page.
